Saturday, December 8, 2012

Contest Time: December Edition

Howdy, minions!
It's time, for December's contest, and I have held off on doing one of these for a while... And I have made the decision to only run this contest once a year from now on... And it will forevermore be the last contest of the year...

INSULT CONTEST 2012: End of the World Edition
 
 
The rules are pretty simple.
#1. Only original insults. I will be checking El Google to see if you guys are plagiarizing, because the whole point is to be creative and ridiculous.
#2. Absolutely no ephitaphs of any kind... Race, sexual orientation, religion, etc, etc. You can absolutely suggest beastiality though. I'm more prone to accusing folks of dendrophilia, but... Whatever.
#3. No repeating insults. This kind of goes along with rule #1... If you can't be bothered to read the insults before yours, then I can't be bothered to give you a prize.
#4. You must be a minion, for your insults to count. If you haven't joined, join up. Make your insults count.
 
 
I, along with two other judges will be picking the best insults. Post insults in the comments section of this thread.
 
Grand prize: One thermal color-change Gorewad, one glow-in-the-dark Gorewad, and a fresh off the press HELL TURTLE.
 
I'll also be picking a runner up, for prizes, as well. Contest runs until Christmas. I'll announce the victor on December 26, 2012.
 
Yappy holidays, minions!
 
-R

39 comments:

  1. I think Big arm jacks off to your mother every night jimmy

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  2. Thats with his left arm, because she's so ugly it wouldn't be worth the effort to use his right.

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    1. I like how not only are they having fantasies about your mom... but she has a penis in their mind....

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    2. If her penis wasn't in my mind, it would be in your anal passage.

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    3. Great... now you've involved me in your fantasies....

      Think I just threw up a little... no wait next you're goint to tell me "That's ok, I'm into that too"

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    4. No im fine thank you, but if you keep it you could use it to mold your toys, they might come out better then.

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    5. Ouch... that might hurt if I had feelings....


      But ever since that night with your mom... I don't feel anything but shame.

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    6. I feel ashamed too ever since me and your mum did the Alabama Hotpot thing.

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    7. That's a lie... never once did she touch anyone in the slow kids class.

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  3. Also ive heard that your mum is replacing santa this year as she has more facial hair than a yeti.

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  4. Your'e right she is replacing santa she wants to know which box you are living in now so she can drop off your new dildo to pleasure thyself

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    Replies
    1. You almost got the contraction right.

      By the way, with all of the discussion of mothers and dildos, I have to ask you: What poor bovine did your mother get to be your sperm donor? And I'm sure, that it undoubtedly wound up being chopped into lines and snorted off of her kitchen table, later that night.

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    2. Why don't you ask your dad Oh Wait lol

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    3. My dad would only know anything about YOUR dad, if YOUR dad wound up on a fucking Big Mac.

      See, that is a cow reference.... Because clearly, you have at LEAST 50% bovine DNA.

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    4. Thats a stupid thing to say Jimmy everyone knows there is no beef in a Big Mac, its a myth. Was George Bush your dad because I can see the similarities, come on get with it Forest!

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  5. Just seen this, reminds me to put the trash out! But I wanted to say: Thanks to your avatar pic! I have it on my basement door... it keeps the rats away

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    1. Well ask him nicely and maybe you can meet in person....

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    2. Probably want to do it at your place though as it seems he has rats.....

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  6. So who's gunna be the first to throw an insult down? C'mon... I want to see the crap fly!

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    Replies
    1. Apparently the shit you've splattered all over the walls of your house isn't enough?

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  7. Saw that amateur "film" you did Jimmy... how come it was all blurry and you can't tell what anything really is?

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    1. I heard about that one, it was the one with him felching a cow right?

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    2. I have no idea... there was somew kind of fleshy garbage bag looking thing...

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  8. Jimmy... yer woman said this is how you are in bed... like this contest.

    Started out kinda weak & then stopped for no reason!

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    Replies
    1. Really? So, you're talking to your wife again?

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  9. Even the crickets have offed themselves due to boredom at this point...........

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    Replies
    1. Luke, I blame you for the stagnation. Nobody wants to follow your stink, or your nasty ass.

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    2. I believe it... and looking around I'd say... maybe they feel bad about competing? I mean it's kind of like racing in the special olympics weilding a bat to take out the competition.

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    3. If this is like running the special olympics looks like you've been doing it on your own Luke.

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    4. Yet somehow, he'll still manage to get a bronze medal.

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  10. I'd compare it more to going to a family reunion trying to pick up women you'd know all too well about that right jimmy get your banjos out Luke hahaha

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    1. I don't know what incestacular family reunions that YOU'VE Been to, RJ, but I think you defnitely revealed a lot more about yourself, and the fact that your family tree looks like a french braid.

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  11. Hey Rdragon, I guess Santa is bringing you the gift of punctuation this year. Good God, the only thing messier than your sentence is your pants.

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    Replies
    1. RJ, are you going to let somebody named Julie talk about your shit-filled pants that way?

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    2. Julie that aint very nice after I defended your honor by climbing that water tower and painting over what they wrote no one talks about my wife and sister like that

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    3. Well that comment fell flat, just like your mums chest.

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  12. This comment has been removed by the author.

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